A Marwari Wedding

 

Marriages are made in heaven but final touch and the celebration is here on earth!

The weddings in India were always an event and different communities have different ways of getting married or I would say taking the 7 steps with mantra & shlokas or with reading of holy Bible or holy Qur'an.

Being in hotel industry for past 42 years, we have organized many wedding events and the underlying fact were two - one of happy celebrations, second of emotion n sentiment while the bride is seen off, bidaai by the family.

Marwari weddings are of lavis, quiet dignity & food, Punjabi weddings are full of energy & show, Maharashtrian weddings are family type & traditional, Christian weddings are quiet to begin with getting in celebration mode once dance begins, Gujarati weddings are traditional with noisy chatter.

The wedding I attended recently, a Marwari wedding, celebration was spread over 2 days 4 functions back to back. About the Food I will be writing a separate blog as it is a vast n delicious subject.

Maira was the first function and is arranged by maternal uncle. Traditional bride pampering, gifting was done. The high tea at poolside was of chaats, juices. Mehendi ceremony, another joyous affair was also happening same time, earlier women in the house used to apply mehendi on the bride’s hands and feet but now professional mehendi artists were called to apply the mehendi. This mehendi is believed to bring-in happiness, abundance and fulfilment in the bride’s life. The groom also applies mehendi for good omen.

In the evening the engagement ceremony (Rupiyo Nariyal) was held. The banquet hall gate was decorated with flowers and flowing silken cloth, the stage had psychedelic setting of images from projector, jhula for the couple. As per current trend the couple arrived to firework shower in lobby, music blaring, the couple walked in the hall with 4 girls traditionally dressed piloting them to the stage, people cheering n clapping. Bride smiling to glory and groom sober. Rings were brought in on floral trays, bride put the ring on groom's finger and when the turn of groom came, the bride demanded He go on knees and ask for her hand to put ring. It was fun, groom sportingly did the act. Cheers. This done, orchestra started for the Sangeet evening and so also dinner was announced. Buffet spread was large.

Next day Haldi program. Well known as Haldi in different cultures, the Pithi Dastoor is an integral pre-wedding ritual. Also, this haldi paste is made of Turmeric powder, sandalwood, milk, saffron and overnight-soaked almonds all mixed in together to make a fine paste. It is also believed to bring a natural glow on the couple’s face on their D-day. It is a ceremony to purify & give good health to the couple. The colour code was yellow ...Flowers, seating, brass vessel, guest dressed in yellow kurta /kurti, lehenga, saree and the whole venue was like Yellowland. The couple arrived amidst beating of dhols, dancing guests and then DJ taking over for the energetic youngsters to dance. Muhurat time and the bride settled on a gold color patla set in a flat brass paraat. The old ladies & other relatives started singing haldi hymns n folksongs, a typical dragging tune. The first haldi was applied by grandmother followed by others. Being applied was haldi, marigold petals were showered, milk and herbal curd pored over the head of bride amongst the folk song sung by the ladies. The banna (groom) and bandi(bride) became the playful victims at the hands of their relatives who applied haldi on them.

Evening was the wedding. The entrance of the wedding venue was exquisitely decorated with garlands and toran, in pink & red hues. The bride arrived and was escorted to the stage. Relatives and friends blessed her, gave gifts as the bride awaited the grooms arrival.  

Before the groom heads to the Wedding venue, his sister ties a golden thread Sehra around the groom’s head and then apply kajal behind his ear to ward off any evil as the banna (groom) gets ready to meet his bandi (bride). The barat reached the wedding venue. Barat is a fun affair for all everyone who is a part of it.

Mama Milni is where the bride’s side welcome the groom’s side. All the respective uncles from both families greeted each other with hugs and garlands. Once this done, the baraat proceeded to the Jaimala venue which was lit up with colourful lights, a ring of fire showers was set for the Couple to step in. Once in, the fire showers were lit, amazing to see the beautifully lit circle with couple in the centre with Varmala in hand. Jai mala as the garlands are called, is no doubt an amusing ceremony as the groom teased the bride by shifting his head back every time the bride tried to garland him. I think the bride made Big eyes to the groom because the second time he quietly surrendered to the Jaimala.

Once all the dance & drama over, the couple entered the Banquet Hall. A few moments spent on stage to meet the guests. After this the wedding ritual started with the couple adorning each other with varmala again, followed by the gath bandhan, pani graha, Kanyadaan and finally the pheras took place. I could see the father of the bride standing and watching with moist eyes. The guests had their fill of the lavish buffet which was really a hard work shown by the cooks, excellent in taste.

“Nikkasi” - it was time for the bandi (bride) to leave her maternal house and bid a goodbye to her family. Bidaii done with emotional hugs and moist eyes but happiness in heart. It is always difficult for a father to see off his daughter in marriage. As the couple left the venue a coconut was placed under the car wheel which is believed to bring happiness and good luck.